'I used to be so excited about bumping into Filipinos because they felt like a window to the world I ached so much for'
People are always surprised to find out I’m a Valentine’s Day hater. I get the same reaction whenever I admit I hate sinigang or that I don’t really dig the music of The Beatles. “B..bbut you’re married! You’re in love!” they gasp in shock, looking at me like I just kicked a kitten or something.
Don’t get me wrong. I love LOVE. I love being in love, I love the person I love, and I’m all for celebrating love. Love’s grand. I just hate all the hype that surrounds it in February – a.k.a. “The LOVE MONTH.”
Pfft. Love Month. Oh, please. Just stop it, business owners and marketing mavens. We know what you’re up to… And that’s my first issue with Valentine’s Day. It’s just way too commercialized – and I think anything that’s too commercialized ruins the sentiment and experience of the celebration.
I feel about it the way I did when I went to Israel once on a tour. I was so excited to see the places where Jesus lived and walked and taught – and so bummed out to find scores of souvenir stalls and pushy salespeople calling out to me on streets I thought were sacred.
I wanted to experience and celebrate something special to me, but all the selling and shekel-shaking going on around me just sucked all the awe out of what should’ve been awesome.
Valentine’s Day is kind of the same. Christmas too, come to think of it. So much hype and selling and expectation surround them that you kind of forget the point. Instead of basking in the pleasure, you’re drowning in the pressure.
And that’s my second issue with V-Day: The pressure. It’s ridiculous, but it’s always there, lurking deviously behind the all the seemingly innocuous pink and red heart-imprinted Valentine’s Day paraphernalia/propaganda.
Take me, for example. I don’t even like receiving flowers. My husband knows this. I mean sure, they’re lovely and all, but they have this annoying tendency to DIE – especially in my care – so I’d really much rather get something more useful. Like food. Food is always good. It doesn’t last very long either – especially in my care – but it’s better than flowers.
Then along comes Valentine’s Day, and everyone’s getting flowers, so all of a sudden, I’m like…
My poor husband. So confused. :)
Like I said, I love love, and I think it should be celebrated. Every day, if possible. But I’m not big on this business of having to celebrate it in a certain way on a certain day. Too much pressure.
If you’re single, the pressure’s there too. It’s just different – and sometimes even worse. And that’s the thing I probably hate the most about Valentine’s Day. It sucks the joy out of just being single. At least, temporarily.
I haven’t been single in quite a while, but I still remember my single self’s Valentine’s Dread like it was yesterday. There you are, totally fine, happily living your awesome, successful single life… and then this stupid DAY comes along and suddenly you feel like the last person picked for the softball team.
What’s up with that??? Geez, man! There’s a reason people say “Happy Holidays!” They’re not supposed to make you miserable!
It’s a pity because being single is actually FANTASTIC. Ask anyone who isn’t. Hehe. Believe me… while you single people are out there wondering if you’ll ever find “The One,” the rest of us in relationships are looking at you and thinking, “Wow. I miss that.”
Yes, even those of us who are happily married. Because “the grass is always greener…” and all that.
Your freedom, your ability to just be and do whatever you want, whenever you want – it’s downright enviable. Revel in it while you can. There are new and different joys that come with finding love, partnering up, getting married, having kids, and so on. But don’t be so fixated on finding those that you forget to realize and enjoy the perks of just being on your own.
I think what most people don’t get is that there’s a difference between being single and being lonely. You can be one and not the other. They’re really not the same thing. But Valentine’s Day has this nefarious ability to make people feel like they are.
So yeah…You kind of suck, Valentine’s Day. Bah, humbug!
But oh, well. It’s not as if I can abolish the holiday – or maybe even petition to move it to February 29, so it happens only once every 4 years. So I might as well just try and enjoy it as best I can. It’s only one day out of 365, after all.
Happy Valentine’s Day! Or not. :) - Rappler.com