Lotis Key: Dolphy was the ‘sunshine of my life’

MANILA, Philippines – Lotis Key is a former film and theater actress. She starred in 85 major films in Asia. In 1986, she moved to the U.S. and worked in TV, industrial video and theater, until 1999. 

In a June 28, 2012 report on TV Patrol from ABS-CBN’s North America bureau chief Nadia Trinidad, Lotis Key gave this statement on Dolphy:

“When I first met Dolphy, I asked him one question: Are you married?

He swore he wasn’t. And of course, that was the truth.

I’d heard he had two or 3 children, but so many Filipino men did; it wasn’t unusual.

I was drawn to him because he was interesting, a true original.

I’d never seen (any) one of his movies when we first met, coming from completely different backgrounds initially. I had no idea how big of a star he actually was.

Our big attraction was that we could both die laughing from our own jokes. Maybe that’s why he wanted us to marry.

His life was often so sad and, when we were together, (we were) like children. We had a lot of silly fun.

He bought us gold wedding rings in Las Vegas. I told him that, first, he must talk to his 3 children and their mother, so they wouldn’t find out from the newspapers.

I didn’t want to hurt them.

He never did it, but — every few months — he would bring out those rings and lay them on my dressing table, my pillow, my plate and just look at me and raise his eyebrows.

I’d laugh and say, “What are we going to do? Run away and live on a desert island? These kids are a part of your life. You have to talk to them.”

I had no idea how complex that one request was. 

It’s hard to believe but I didn’t know that there was more than one woman and more than one set of kids.

My Tagalog was very poor. I wasn’t really part of the movie world. I only went to the set and then straight home. I’m not a gossiper and, anyway, my friends weren’t movie people so they didn’t know anything about him.

I was an introvert who read all time and rarely went out of the house, except to work.

Anyway, our years together were marked by hysterical ‘kwentuhan’ that made us laugh so hard we’d both get asthma attacks. Even after we’d separated, we’d still go out regularly for dinner; every week or so as an excuse to talk for hours.

His life was complicated. His business, his families, his girlfriends. I think that we were actually bestfriends more than anything else.

Apart from what I earned in his movies and the birthday or holiday presents, I never asked money from him. He wanted to build me a house but I refused. I never accepted ‘sustento’ or allowance.

It was funny because people said it was a sign of his low regard for me that I didn’t have a lot of material things.

To save my ‘reputation,’ I was even advised to lie and said he’d given me ‘this’ or ‘that.’

His money never interested me. I found people interesting and him, particularly. 

In San Francisco last year, someone pointed out a woman to me and whispered, ‘That’s one of the mothers.’

I went over and introduced myself. I asked her forgiveness for the pain I’d unwittingly caused so many years ago. She turned out to be a lovely, gracious and intelligent woman.

Well, he is who he is, isn’t he?

I guess he never held a gun to anyone’s head to make them love him.

Oh, Dolphs, you were the sunshine of my life in those days. Somewhere in time we’ll always be connected, two giggling kids in blue jeans.

In my old age now, I think of you and smile.” – Rappler.com

(Lotis Key now lives in Minnesota, USA. She is a writer, creative director of a theater group and the happy wife of Bambi Cabigting.)

 

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