Successfully shift in 2013

MANILA, Philippines – To create change first re-interpret your story.

So begins a post on inspirational website Purpose Fairy on December 30, 2012 titled How to Create a Shift for 2013.

The article lists 7 steps on how to start the new year fresh and right. It is written by business and life coach Jim Koehneke, MA, author of Take Charge of Your Life – Seven Steps for Reclaiming Your Personal Power.

Here is my take on what Koehneke calls the “inner-to-outer process”:

1. Remember that thoughts become things, as told in The Secret

Koehneke asks us to remember that our beliefs get played out in our life.

Philosopher, author and life coach Bob Proctor tells us in The Secret, “If you see it in your mind, you’re going to hold it in your hand.” This stresses the importance of positive thinking. Let go of everything negative; not only do they pull your energy down and drain you, but while you keep thinking them, they keep getting real for you, too.

Leave all the bad of 2012 behind. Write them on paper and burn it. Let the bad feelings melt away with the smoke.

Look at 2013 with fresh eyes and see the beauty you missed before. It’s a world of infinite possibilities.

2. Understand your “programming” that limits you

Somewhere in your subconscious are beliefs that still frame your reality. Meditate, reflect and do a checklist:

• What are outdated?
• What are no longer applicable?
• What hold you back from being the person you want to become?

Eliminate the old beliefs, re-program yourself. Rehash the still-applicable ones with the needs of today’s times. Do not be afraid to start with a clean slate.

Remember the song of orphan girl Annie in the movie and musical that says, “The sun will come out tomorrow.” Every day is a chance to do things right, if not better.

3. Decide to let go and heal

Feelings are just feelings; they are not necessarily the truth. Sometimes, our feelings even prevent us from seeing, understanding and appreciating the truth.

Go deep within yourself and identify your dominant feelings, the ones that keep coming up and affecting your life. What situations or circumstances bring these feelings about? Part of the change you may want for 2013 is to avoid the ones that make you feel bad. Remember that bad feelings are a reminder that you are not aligned with your deepest truth.

Recognize the situations or circumstances that make you feel good and make sure to do them more or to share them with others this year. Positive feelings breed positive events.

Release repressed feelings; find a creative outlet. It is your right to feel good. So allow yourself to feel good.

Dream if you must. It’s free. Write your dreams down as goals and visualize them coming true this 2013.

4. Give yourself the benefit of the doubt

If you do this for others, do this for yourself, too.

When you have a thought, ask yourself:

• Is what you think true? 
• Is your initial thought or reaction aligned with your thoughts and feelings after you have given something (or someone) some thought?

Koehneke reminds us: “You have total authority over your thoughts, your feelings and what you believe. You are the king or queen of your kingdom, and how you express your power is based on what you choose to believe, say and do.”

Use your power wisely. A sign of maturity is not acting on impulse or on a whim. I observe that a lot of people these days tweet or post their feelings; nothing wrong with that. This is what has given social media its power. 

But there is such a thing as doing this all too soon and ending up drying your dirty laundry in public, giving people too much information that you forget to respect your own privacy.

A rule of thumb: When in doubt, don’t. If you have started tweeting something but a small voice tells you it’s not completely right to post it, leave it as draft and go back to it later. You may just save yourself from irreparable damage.

5. Embrace a new school of thought

Let go of every thing and any thing that has been ruling you and limiting you. Let go. See yourself in your mind crumpling each of them, throwing them in the trash. Say goodbye to them and to your old self, happily.

Be aware of the reasoning behind each. Koehneke gives this example: 

If you have been limiting yourself by not sharing your opinions, your reasoning (excuse?) might be, “Because nobody really values what I have to say.”

His advice: Turn it the other way. When this reasoning attacks, stop it, look it in the eye, turn it around and send it away. Think, “Everybody values what I have to say” or, as Koehneke puts it:

“I have powerful insights to share that can help others.”  You really do. So speak up. 

6. Let fear make you act

Changes are scary, challenging and difficult. They always are. Remember that nothing worthwhile was ever easy and not scary. As Save Philippine Seas founder, environmentalist and blogger Anna Oposa shared in her Life lessons from 2012, “Fear reminds you that you are on to something important. But do not wait for conditions to be perfect. The only way to begin is to begin.”

Based on steps 1 to 5:

• What are your new, positive thoughts? 
• What is your new programming that does not limit you? 
• What are your dreams and goals for the year? 
• What is your new paradigm, your new school of thought?

As you think of these, be aware of your feelings. Feel scared? It’s alright; turn it into excitement and thrilled anticipation.

Go deep and think of the small acts and steps that can help you deepen this positive feeling even more. This way, you will not get overwhelmed by your dreams and goals, and you will stay guided by your new thoughts.

Remember that the small steps and acts count. The biggest movements in social media began with one person sharing a story that moved him (whether positively or negatively) with his network or one person tweeting an observation. It always begins with one small step. So take it.

Your newfound positivity will attract people and circumstances in your life that will help make your dreams and goals come true. You remember how a negative person drained you because you got her bad vibe? Don’t be that person. Be the one who attracts people because the energy you give off makes them feel good not only about you but about themselves, too. You will find that the Universe will be good to you just as you are good to others.

7. Pat yourself on the back

Okay, so have:

• Written down your dreams and set practical goals to make your dreams come true
• Engaged the fear that makes you scared of failure and turned it around into positive thrill, excitement and anticipation of success
• Thrown out negative beliefs that limit you
• Recognized and released repressed feelings that weigh you down
• Identified positive circumstances and situtations that make you feel good and allow you to release positive vibes that make others feel good, too

You can’t do anything now but watch your goals materialize. When they do and no one else recognizes your small successes, look in the mirror and thank yourself for a job well done, even pat yourself on the back literally. Give your reflection a high five.

The responsibility of boosting your own morale falls on you, primarily. Do not look for it outside or from others.

You made something happen that is good not only for you but to the over-all energy of the world — celebrate it! Rejoice in it. Know that someone else somewhere is struggling to feel the way you do, and say a little prayer of enlightenment for that person.

But do not over gloat, Koehneke reminds us: “Remind yourself that your power rests in what you choose to believe and make real.” 

But life is not perfect; nothing is.

When things go wrong, hold the self-blame and self-hate. “Be gentle with yourself,” says Koehneke. “Much of what we believe rests in our unconscious mind.”

Stay vigilant and persistent with the reality that you want. Sure, cry and allow yourself to feel bad, but do not wallow and feel sorry for yourself.

Jack Canfield of Chicken Soup for the Soul fame reminds us in The Secret that our story is the story of 85% of the rest of us. The Universe does not revolve around only you; each of us are but a speck of dust in the greater scheme of things. Bounce back (And again, try to hold off on those negative tweets and posts. They might not be necessary in the long run.).

The beauty lies in the difference that “speck of dust” can make. Each of us has a power that can affect everyone else, and that energy is a living organism in itself (Don’t believe me? Check out the network-based visual analysis of the #CoronaTrial tweets. It looks like a living cell! — My son Basti says it looks like a flower.)

Remember the words inner-to-outer — what is inside us manifests outside us as our reality. It begins deep within as a belief that drives a thought that affects our actions.

So take control, get a grip. This 2013, be the one who maps out your life. – Rappler.com

(Happy new year, everyone! Join the conversation at @rapplerdotcom. Use the hashtag #Start2013Right. – KLM)