Boring US elections

By Philippine standards, elections in the US are boring.

At its worst, political rivals here throw mud at each other to the extreme of character assassination. And with the June 3 US Primary Election going into the homestretch, voters are deluged with negative campaign ads in all media including that of a CCTV footage posted on YouTube of former Assemblywoman Mary Hayashi who is running for the California State Senate. She was caught shoplifting designer clothes and accessories at a Neiman Marcus store in San Francisco in a Wynona Ryder fashion.

But political mudslinging is the least of the worries of campaigning Philippine politicians who are used to stealing taxpayers’ money and getting away with it.

Even in rare cases when they get caught and sent to jail, they are always bailed out by the electorate for other elective positions like in the case of Erap Estrada and Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo, both jailed for plunder and both now reelected public officials.

For no election in the Philippines is without violence and death, with the tally of bodies directly proportional to how high the position is being campaigned for, especially in local elections where bad blood runs deep among political dynasties.
What are keeping them awake at night are nightmares of actually being assassinated; of being buried six-feet deep in mud.

Although guns are part of American life as rice is to Filipinos, we don’t hold suffrage hostage at gunpoint. We don’t have the martyrs guarding ballot boxes with their life from heavily-armed goons from both sides trying to wrestle victory by stealing votes, literally.

In the US, we cheat in elections with finesse, like how incumbent politicians pass laws to gerrymander electoral districts to favor their reelection or their party’s candidates. Or, in the case of white conservative Southern states, physically prevent those without IDs, mostly the poor blacks and Latinos, from casting their votes.

Voters fund campaigns

We don’t buy votes in cash here either. On the contrary, the flood of money goes the other way.

Voters are the ones who give money to fund election campaigns. The biggest campaign donors of them all usually are the ones doing the buying of candidates who tie them up to their vested interest; the labor unions are the reliable cash cow for Democrats as big business is to the Republicans. From POTUS to the lowly city councilman, they all genuflect to the altar of money to build their war chest.

And while Filipinos are so fanatic about their candidates even at the barangay level, the Americans are notoriously absent in the electoral process unless it’s a presidential election.

Primary elections such as those on June 3 are marred by low turnouts or about 40% less than those voting in the general presidential elections.

During the 2012 primary elections, only 17% of registered voters went to the polls. Voters are also older, conservative and white – that’s why the Republicans are projected to win control of both the House and the Senate this year.

But what I missed most in Philippine elections are the pompom girls. Those bevies of young beauties in their body-hugging tees and bootylicious-tight short-shorts parading in high heels to kick-off campaign sorties in the neighborhood. On the day of the election itself, you get the added bonus of receiving cash with the candidate’s flyer attached to it.

In here, there is no welcoming crowd. With nary the pomp and – not even an entourage – but only the candidate himself in tow, you walk for miles knocking on doors from house to house canvassing votes. At the end of the day, you may even be asked to donate more money to the campaign.

And that’s when I long to be in the Philippines during elections where I get fed with a Jollibee lunchbox, clothed with a T-shirt with matching sun visors and hand fans, and receiving the customary bribe even if I do nothing. Not even going to the polls to vote.

It’s twisted, alright, but hey, what could be more rotten than politics itself and the politicians who bask in its dirt. – Rappler.com

Oscar Quiambao is a businessman  and former business journalist from Manila who now lives in the San Francisco Bay Area. This column was republished with permission from Philippine News.