Day 9: Boy Wonder flops

(Holo is a satirical blogger. He also interviews Twitter personalities via the hashtags #in140char (“Twitterviews” with journalists and celebrities) and #TweetConPH (Social media conference with policymakers and advocates). You may follow his account on Twitter: @I_amHolo.) 

 

Here are the highlights of Day 9 of the impeachment trial of Chief Justice Renato Corona based on my transcription of the proceeding.

1:59 pm: Session starts. Roll call: 17 senator-judges present. Senator-judge Miriam Defensor-Santiago is still absent because her blood pressure shot up to 180/100 while tweeting more than 140 characters per second against her critics.  (In a post via Twitlonger, the distinguished baby from Iloilo says: “This is to cordially announce that I shall no longer answer any media question asking me to respond to personal attacks by submental cretins, lower life forms, imbeciles and dimwits.”)

2:05 pm: Prosecution asks impeachment court if defense has complied with the submission of lists of witnesses, evidence; Defense says no need. They expect the next witness to defect to defense.

2:19 pm: Session suspended. Enrile listens to playlist on his Walkman 

2:20 pm: Session resumes. Now on witness stand is Megaworld senior vice president for marketing and sales Noli Hernandez. Direct examination by prosecution’s Boy Wonder Joseph Joemer Perez. Perez says Hernandez’s testimony will be to prove spouses Corona bought and acquired condominium unit in Bellagio at P14.5 million, with 40% discount.

Hernandez testifies Coronas bought property in September 2008. He explains why the selling price was reduced. He says the unit was delivered as “semi-bare,” after sustaining some water leakage due to typhoons, floods, earthquakes, the Lehman brothers, tsunamis and GMA.

Boy Wonder begins direct recitation.

JPE becomes impatient with Boy Wonder. He keeps banging his gavel and admonishing Boy Wonder:

JPE to Perez: “Boy Wonder, you are twisting the answer of the witness! It’s reduction, not discount. Reduction is for condos. Discount is for candies.”

Pimentel agrees: “Wala talaga ang discount sa articles of impeachment. Bro, ‘wag ka nang makulit. Payong kapatid.” 

2:43 pm: Senator-judge Pia Cayetano manifests, says they have been discussing the ‘discount’ for more than 30 minutes and asks its relevance to Article 2. 

Boy Wonder apologizes. I profusely apologize, Madam Senator. I couldn’t tell if you’re already bored. You only have one facial expression.

2:50 pm: Boy Wonder’s direct recitation ends. Lecture on cross examination by Enrile begins. 

2:52 pm: Senator-judge Ferdinand Marcos Jr. raises a point of order.

Enrile: What’s your order Mr. President? 

Bongbong: Excuse me, your Honor, I am Sen. Bongbong Marcos.  

Enrile: IKR? Your father was not ignorant of the law. He was the law.

3:09 pm: Cuevas ends lecture. Questions from several senator-judges. 

First off is Senator-judge Jinggoy Estrada, asks about the damage in the unit, and if discounts are given to VIPs. “I’m interested. Actually, Erap is. We want to sell our defective mansion in  Wack-Wack and our log cabins in Baguio. 

3:24 pm: Senator-judge Ralph Recto: Me, two! 

3:37 pm: Senator-judge Francis Pangilinan: Me, three! 

(@sharon_cuneta12, who was monitoring the proceeding, tweeted: Meganun, honey? Winner! May megastar ka na, may Megaworld pa! Come home early!!!)

Hernandez, “Actually, at the time of water damage, I was told there were interested clients including Sharon and Vilma. But in the end, we gave it to Mrs Corona,” Hernandez tells court.

3:53 pm: Senator-judge Manuel Villar,  a real-estate mogul, asks questions.

Mr. Witness, nakaligo ka na ba sa dagat ng basura?

Nagpasko ka na ba sa gitna ng kalsada?

Yan ang tanong namin

4:50 pm: Senator-judge Ramon “Bong” Revilla Jr asks questions to Hernandez. Who are the Lehman Brothers? You’ve been blaming them. I begin to suspect they were also the  ones who killed Ramgen.

4:55 pm: Senator-judge Joker Arroyo manifests, asks prosecution about the impeachment of another justice. “We are disturbed… do you expect the Senate to also attend to that?”

Tupas answers, no, they don’t intend to, and says report is inaccurate. We are going to impeach 100 more witnesses.

5:04 pm: Session adjourns. Trial to resume at 2pm on Wednesday, February 1, 2012. – Rappler.com