Sports vs fraternities: Why choose sports instead

MANILA, Philippines – Like it or not, fraternities are part of the college culture in the Philippines. Numerous casualties have been reported over the years and as if that wasn’t enough, another hazing incident made the public buzz when Guillo Servando, an 18-year-old College of St Benilde sophomore student, was added to the tally.

In the light of this recent event, few lawmakers themselves tend to agree that RA 8049, more known as the Anti-Hazing law, is simply not enough to prevent fraternity killings. Sure, the act is imposed as a law to prevent neophytes (incoming/new members) from being physically injured, but how it is being implemented and how it oversees thousands of fraternity members to prevent such incidents is a gray area.

READ: DLSU condemns ‘barbaric act’ of hazing

As a kid born and raised in Manila, turning down fraternity invites was something I had to deal with since high school. Though curious, the thought of getting hit without a chance of hitting back was something I can’t bear. My pride simply won’t allow it. I eventually found myself joining a gang where hazing comes with a chance to defend myself. The gang was nothing but an unorganized group of unscrupulous, childish street thugs who were up to no good. Still, the fraternity invites didn’t stop until I was in my early 20s.

When I was 5 years old, my mother made me take basketball classes so I can get involved in sports at a young age. But unlike most Filipinos, I was not into basketball. I would play from time to time in my teenage years but my passion for the sport wasn’t there. I could care less about my physique during those times. Hanging out with the wrong people ultimately saw me having vices.

Having been involved in many fights due to the wrong company behind my back, Muay Thai was a sport I had always wanted to try. That chance never came until I had a job and was earning money for myself. After a few training sessions and a short amateur stint, I realized Muay Thai wasn’t for me either. What Muay Thai did for me though was to transition me to boxing.

Boxing at last, became my sport haven. I was so passionate and committed to what I was doing. I trained 6 times a week for two years and competed in the amateurs. The sport helped me trim down from 184 pounds to 138 pounds. It gave me confidence, enhanced my discipline and made me stop nonsense vices. I wanted to step up my game but my body gave in.

The predicament of not starting the sport, and taking care of my body, at a young age caught up to me. Or at least that’s how I feel. It made me realize that if a person can get into his/her right sport at the right time, it contributes not only to the person’s health but also molds him/her to be an overall better person.

The years I wasted smoking and drinking could have been years that I trained in the boxing gym. If one can devote his/her time in sports then that eliminates wasting time in non-productive areas – such as getting helplessly beat-up in hazing to enter a fraternity.

How and why some are lured to join

For Jack Mallari, a medicine student and member of one of the most popular fraternal organizations in the country, a certain level of machismo is achieved upon earning membership. The idea of joining a fraternity first captured his imagination as early as his teenage years in high school before eventually joining one in college two years ago, at 22 years old.

The hearsay of standing out compared to those who are not members is what sparked his interest the most.

“I heard of how exclusive it is to be in this fraternity and how every brother belonging to it is said to be cool, strong and brave compared to those who are not affiliated,” Mallari quipped. “I told myself, one day, I’ll be a part of it.”

His chance came when the group dropped by their classroom to personally invite students to attend their fraternity orientation. Mallari was one of the few who received an official invitation card, sparking his interest yet again but this time matched with curiosity as to what the brotherhood saw to deem him worthy of joining the organization.

“It somehow amused me that they took notice when in fact I aspired to become one of them when I was younger,” remembered Mallari. “Right then and there, I decided to give it a shot and undergo the process to become a member of the fraternity.”

“During the orientation, the members said that there will be no hazing involved in the pledge-ship process; that they are strictly abiding the anti-hazing law but I never believed it.”

Mallari soon found out that what he believed was true. The fraternity, like most of their counterparts, does not abide in the anti-hazing law. He admits most fraternities’ strategy is to make new comers believe that there will be no hazing. After all, doing such prevents fear and worry, attracting more possible members. Mallari knew first hand that he was deceived but it never discouraged him from trying.

He underwent the initiation process, getting beat up left, right and center every single day. He goes home late at night covered in wounds and bruises. He learned to lie to his parents to prevent them from getting disappointed; deceived his girlfriend just to keep her in his life.

An academic standout, Mallari at one point started to doubt himself and feared being kicked out from school. Distraction from his fraternity venture had gotten the best of him. Worse, he feared for his life.

Mallari was on the verge of quitting but friends who were undergoing the same initiation process urged him to stay on, prompting him to go on and blindly take all the physical abuse day in and day out. His guts and desire to become a full fledged member ultimately pulled him through after what had become a total nightmare of an experience for many months. Finally, he was a brother.

“It was awkward at first to see the people who beat you for God knows how long every single day,” said Mallari. “It took me a couple of months to get used to it and get along with them.”

The perks of his fraternity membership? He now has people to call his brothers and sisters. People bonded by the experience and principles they share. There were also advantages when it came to school matters. Mallari could now borrow books, notes and equipment from his “upper” class brothers along with some efficient tips on how to study for quizzes and exams.

He was able to conduct minor surgeries and issue prescriptions with the help of the fraternity’s medical and surgical missions. He travelled the country to serve many Filipinos. Being part of a fraternity boosted his morale as he now possessed more confidence to face other people and challenges that life may throw at him.

But the question still lingered: Were the months of absolute beat down worth it?

A false sense of machismo

“Bugbog na nga katawan ko sa swimming team magpapa-bugbog pa ‘ko sa paddle ni’yo (My body is already beat up in the swimming team, [why] allow myself to get beat up by your paddle),” was sports advocate and journalist Chino Trinindad’s verbatim response each time he got invited to join a fraternity during his college days.

Such bold response, he said, led fraternity recruiters to simply walk away and leave him be.

Being in the swimming team kept Trinidad occupied and focused, providing him no time to entertain such invites. The sport taught him to be disciplined at all times.

Being a father himself, he told his son that he should already know what was right and wrong when he got to college. He knew that fraternity invites are just around the corner but thankfully, his son made him proud and walked the same path as he did. Instead of getting hazed and joining a fraternity, his son spends his precious time and energy in dancing.

Surviving a fraternity hazing never was, and never will be, an act of machismo. Want to test your manhood? Wear a pair of gloves and test your mettle inside a boxing ring. Spar a professional boxer and challenge yourself. Not only does it allow you to fight back, it also keeps you fit. More importantly, it is a sport, meaning what you do is legal.

“I don’t think so,” answered Trinidad when asked about the perception of joining getting through hazing is an act of machismo. “Having fake friends or fake brothers isn’t my concept of true manhood. Manhood comes from within!”

He continued, “There’s a time in a youth’s life where he/she will go through the seeking of belongingness. Sports taught me how to be confident on what I can do on my own.”

Mark Villanueva, a boxing advocate from Iloilo City, shares the same sentiment.

“To go through hell in hazing activities is something I do not understand the need for, that puts people in grave danger. It certainly doesn’t raise the purpose of the organization to another level just because its applicants have to undergo baptism by fire. If anything, I feel this requirement is more limiting than beneficial to a social group’s core purpose.”

What can be done moving forward

Mark Villanueva uses boxing as a platform to distract the youth off the streets and lure them to the gym. He uses his “Mark Villanueva Boxing Academy” to provide training and equip children with traits and values to be successful in life.

Villanueva finds nothing wrong with being part of a fraternity in its ideal sense – formed for legitimate causes or for the mutual benefit of its members. He said it embodies our freedom of association and is perhaps to test one’s willingness or to build a union’s prestige that applicants are tested before they become regular members.

At this very moment, Villanueva is working on a program called “Homing Through Sports” using his academy. He provides a thorough explanation of what it is about.

“It is a unique way of self discovery through the rigid challenges the sport of boxing imposes, which has helped me tame my anger and anxieties as a young man. It is the toughest sport in the world, and you really don’t have to actually beat one another to realize this. The key is to use boxing for what it truly is – discipline. And as my co-writer and friend of the Academy, Mr Pitts had told me in the process of this research, one doesn’t necessarily have to train to fight. It is about the discipline involved in the sport. The self actualization. It puts balance in your life.

“In life, as in boxing, it is about knowing who you are, digging deep within yourself, cultivating the necessary values needed to succeed with grit and above all, integrity. It teaches the youth to focus on the purpose and not abuse.”

Sports reduces pressure and stress. It is scientifically proven that exercising is the natural way to loosen stress.

Getting into sports teaches teamwork which molds leadership. Collaborating with teammates, coaches, and at times even the audience, teaches how to effectively communicate with people en route to victory. Such practice will help in life when encountering problems at home, work or in any arena.

The beauty of it is it’s never too late to get into sports. As mentioned in this column earlier, sports keeps an individual occupied. Sports teaches self-respect, discipline and hones better character. In sports, you will find not just a brotherhood, but family. Sports is a way of life. 

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JM Siasat is a sports journalist based in Manila, Philippines. He can be reached at jmsiasat@ymail.com. Follow him on Twitter @jmsiasat