Dear Senator Sotto and all men who feel entitled

(Editor’s note: Netizens have called out Senator Vicente “Tito” Sotto III  for a remark he made during an episode of Eat Bulaga on Saturday, July 9. He suggested that a female contestant was at fault because she must have been drunk and was in shorts when she was taken advantage of by a friend.)

This isn’t easy as I’ve kept this to myself for years. 

I was 12 when a guy I really trusted molested me.

I wasn’t intoxicated. I was asleep.

I wasn’t wearing anything provocative, unless you’d consider basketball shorts and a loose shirt provocative.

I wasn’t flirting with him as he was a relative. I was also very young then.

I wasn’t in a public and dangerous place. In fact, I was in my own room.

Also, I didn’t ask for it. How could I? Why would I?

I’m sure you’ll argue that my case is an exception. I thought so, too. That’s why, as a kid, I felt so ashamed. I thought it was my fault. For years, I blamed myself. I always thought less of myself because I felt stupid. I felt weak. I felt small. It wasn’t until I learned of many others like me that I realized that it wasn’t my fault. That I wasn’t an exception. And that in fact, the only person there is to blame is you – you and your self-entitled kind.

I was molested. And so were millions of others. And millions more will be after us.

That’s just how it is. Not because women will choose to continue drinking. Not because women will choose to continue wearing shorts. And not because women will continue to choose being among men. It’s because you will continue to feel entitled to women just because you’re a man.

I was molested. And so were millions of others. And millions more will be after us.

And honestly, it was and will be because of you. It’s because of that one rape joke you thought was really funny and harmless. It’s because of that one time you and your brods checked out that passerby’s ass and talked about wanting to fuck her because “boys will be boys”.

It’s because of that moment you heard about sexual harassment or abuse, and blamed the girl for it because you thought she asked for it. It’s because of that one time you thought your right to force yourself into a woman was wholly dependent upon how short her skirt was, and not on whether or not she gave her consent. (READ: The thingy called rape culture)

You probably won’t care after this. Why would you, right? We’re not related. You don’t even know me. I’m probably just a casualty. An unfortunate case. But let me tell you this..

The next time a 12 year-old gets molested, it could be your daughter. And the only thing I want you to know is that there will be no one else to blame but you – you and all the men who feel entitled.

Don’t let her grow up in a world where being a girl is the most dangerous thing. Don’t let her grow up in this world you created where her value as a person depends upon the length of her skirt. Don’t let her grow up in your inexcusable bullshit.

She doesn’t and will never deserve that. I didn’t deserve that. I don’t. – Rappler.com 

Currently taking up Law, Alex Castro graduated cum laude with a degree of  BA Psychology in the University of the Philippines Diliman. She served as the USC Vice Chairperson in UP-Diliman in 2012-2013 and USC Chairperson from 2013-2014. 

This was first posted on Alex Castro’s Facebook account. We are publishing it with her permission.