MANILA, Philippines – It’s official. Kathryn Bernardo and Daniel Padilla confirmed that they have been in a relationship for “more than 5 years.” In a recent interview, the popular love team, known as Kathniel, opened up about the challenges of being in a long-term commitment.
“It’s a 24 hour job na maging malupit na (to be a good) boyfriend. ‘Di puwedeng nagiging komportable ka, kasi once na maging komportable ka, wala ka nang gagawin,” Daniel said during the press conference for their latest movie The Hows of Us. (READ: Daniel Padilla, Kathryn Bernardo’s relationship status: ‘Exclusively dating’)
(You can’t be comfortable because when you become comfortable, you’ll stop making an effort.)
For 6 years, they spent almost every waking hour together – on-screen as Kathniel filming movies and endorsements, off-screen as real-life couple Kathryn and DJ. Admittedly, there were moments in those 6 years when they felt like giving up.
From simple miscommunications to petty discussions leading to confrontations, Kathniel has been through it all.
“How did we save it? Kasi gusto namin (Because wanted to),” Kathryn said.
“For me, choice niyo ‘yung parating dalawa kung itutuloy pa ba or ilalaban pa ba and ‘yun pinili namin. I think I made the right choice. For me naman kasi, sa isang relationship kahit gaano natin siya kagusto maging perfect, ‘di siya mangyayari. Basta ang importante dito, may natutunan ka, sabay kayo mag-grow and move on and ‘yun ‘yung pinili namin ni DJ.”
(For me, it’s always a choice to continue the relationship or fight for it and that’s what we chose. I think I made the right choice. For me, a relationship is never perfect, no matter how hard you try. But the important thing here is that you learn, move on, and you grow together – that’s what DJ and I chose to do.)
During those tough times, Daniel said that all he needed was a reminder of how it all began.
“Maraming beses na tinanong, ‘Kung gusto mo pa ba?’ and ‘Kaya mo pa ba ‘to?’… Lagi akong bumabalik sa ‘Bakit ko nga ba minahal ang taong to?’ Kasi malamang nag-aaway kayo ngayon, pero siyempre kailangan mong tingnan ‘yung mas malalim sa problema na ‘to. Maaaring nagkakaproblema lang tayo ngayon pero saan ba tayo nanggaling at nasaan na ba tayo ngayon. Laging ganun.”
(There were many times I asked myself: ‘Do I still want this?’ or ‘Can you still do this?’… and I always go back to ‘Why do I love this person?’ Because you fight now but you have to think about things deeply. You may have problems now but where did we come from and where are we now. It should always be that way.)
For most of us, the beginning of a new relationship is the most magical. The experience of getting to know someone who could possibly be “the one” is always exciting. But as reality starts to sink in, it gets harder and harder to keep the giddy feeling. The same can be said for Kathniel.
“Sa buong buhay ko sa showbiz siya lang ang kasama ko, hanggang ngayon. So imaginin niyo na lang na sa personal magkasama kami pati sa trabaho everyday magkasama. Kung iisipin niyo eh mukhang masaya siya kasi araw araw kayo magkasama pero siyempre darating yung point na, ‘Araw araw na tayo magkasama Kathryn no?’ ‘Di ba? Darating ‘yun normal yun,” Daniel admitted.
(In my whole showbiz career, she’s the only one I’ve been with – even until now So just imagine that we’re together, even during work. You would think it’s always happy because we’re together everyday but there comes a point where you think, ‘We’re together everyday Kathryn, right?’ It’s normal to reach that point.)
Whenever they find themselves in a rut, Kathryn and Daniel said they try to do new things to spice up the relationship. Giving each other time and respecting their partner’s independence is also one of the key ingredients to a happy relationship.
“Kailangan sa isang relationship to work feeling ko may nabibigay ka iba or mas nagma-mature kayo together… Ang secret lang talaga is you grow together and basta wag lang talaga too much sa lahat. Kunwari si DJ binibigyan ko pa rin siya ng buhay niya with family, with friends. Ako, binibigyan rin niya ko. Basta wag lang to the point na sasakalin ‘yung isa’t isa. Kailangan meron din kayong buhay separately and together, of course,” said Kathryn.
(For a relationship to work, I feel you need to bring something new to the table so you mature together… the secret is growing together and never doing things too much. For instance, I make it a point for DJ to have a life with his family, with friends. He also gives me time. Just don’t reach a point where you’re smothering each other. You have to live lives bother separately and together.)
More than kilig, Daniel explained that, as cheesy as it sounds, it all boils down to finding a partner that makes you want to be a better version of yourself.
“Si Kathryn kasi totoo ‘yung she makes me a better person. Totoo ‘yun. I think ‘yun ‘yung complement. ‘Yung kesa sa kilig ‘yun ‘yung kailangan mong hanapin. It doesn’t mean na kapag nawala na ‘yung kilig, hindi mo na mahal kailangan mo lang hanapin ‘yung mas malalim na rason kung bakit mo ba mahal ‘yung tao.”
(Kathryn makes me a better person. It’s true. I think that what complements it. More than the kilig, that’s what you need to look for. It doesn’t mean that if there’s no kilig, you don’t love the person. You just need to look for the reason why you love that person.)
“Mas looking forward akong makasama pa si Kathryn sa mas marami pang biyahe sa personal naming buhay dahil marami pa kaming mga gagawin. I think ‘yun ‘yung the next level of love,” he said.
(I look forward to being with Kathryn in more journeys in our personal lives because we’re going to do more. I think that’s the next level of love.)
Married by 30
Kathryn and Daniel have the same stance when it comes to relationships – you should be in it for the long haul.
“Kung ‘di mo nakikita ‘yung future mo sa ibang tao bakit ka mags-stay? So sa amin ni DJ, nandito kami, kapit kamay kami hanggang ngayon kasi may dahilan kung bakit kami nags-stay at marami kaming gustong gawin in the future together,” Kathryn said.
(If you don’t see each other in your respective futures, why stay in the relationship? With DJ and me, we’re together in this up to now because there’s a reason why we’re staying together and we still want to do things in the future together.)
From their dream wedding to their ideal home, Kathryn and Daniel already have their future planned out. Both in their early 20s, the couple said they want to settle down before they hit 30.
“‘Di pa natin alam kung kaya na pero ayokong late kasi importante sa’kin ang personal na buhay ko. Andito tayo lahat sa industriya na ‘to pero kailangan natin bumitaw sa tunay na buhay,” Daniel explained.
(We don’t know what will happen but I don’t want it to be late because I value my person life. We’re all in this industry but we need to let go and go back to the real world.)
The couple, however, have very different ideas when it comes to their dream wedding. While Kathryn wanted an intimate beach wedding with only their closest friends and family, Daniel wanted a grand ceremony with all their fans.
“Naisip ko lang, ‘di ba nila deserve ‘yun, ‘yung moment na ‘yun? Pero doesn’t mean may pictorial dun. Wala nandun lang sila. Siyempre pinanood nila ‘yung journey namin mula simula ‘di ba? Deserve nila makita ‘yun kung saan napunta.”
(I thought about it. Don’t they deserve that moment as well? But it doesn’t mean there will be a pictorial there. They’re just there. Of course, they’ve watched our journey from the start right? They deserve to see where the story goes.) – Rappler.com