[Dash of SAS] Talk Du-dirty to me

Ana P. Santos

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'You are not even officially President yet, but you certainly don’t disappoint. Every day you give it to us, harder, deeper than the last time'

Oooh, Digong, what have you done to me? To us?

Ummm…every day we wait breathlessly for what I know will be another day of biting remarks, expletives and verbal ejaculations like that most recent wolf whistle.

Some people say it is the product of a complex mastermind but you and I both know that you’re just being yourself – a bad boy. A very bad boy who gets excited by incensing people, annoying them and sparking discord in an already divided country.

Oooh, Digong, you’re so bad you should be spanked.  

You are not even officially President yet, but you certainly don’t disappoint. Every day you give it to us, harder, deeper than the last time.

You were annoyed that you, as Mayor, were not given first dibs to an Australian missionary. You cursed the Pope. And then admonished the United Nations, the multi-agency group that is one of the Philippines’s largest donors. My eyes cannot help but widen each time you brazenly show us that no one could possibly be bigger than you.  

Whenever you display your manhood like that, it makes me bite my lower lip in anticipation. I know you won’t stop. You will just keep it coming and coming.

I know. I shouldn’t be talking like this to the highest elected official in the land, the one who will represent our country and stand alongside other world leaders. I know. You’re old enough to be a grandfather. But I can’t help it. This is what you bring out in me, what you bring out in every person you touch with your words. You are a madman, wild and drunk with power and you are unstoppable.

You always need to be the man on top. Wolf-whistling a female journalist (would you do it to a male one, I wonder? C’mon, haven’t you ever wondered what it’s like to get it from behind?) to make a joke at her expense, to make her feel uncomfortable and unsafe? To annoy and insult her husband – just because you think you can. Just because you cannot pass up a chance to show that you’re the man.

I imagine you watching from your throne as the country tears itself apart. Filipino against Filipino, all in the name of Digong. Some screaming, “Digong, yes!” Others chanting, “Digong, no!”

You like that, don’t you? You like it rough. You like it dirty.

You need to show that you’ve earned the nickname “The Punisher” even if, by your own admission, you need to pop a Viagra pill first to do it.

Oh, have I insulted you? Or have I flattered you?

Like you, I won’t take back anything I’ve said. You shouldn’t take things too seriously. I’m just being playful, Digong. You already know how this game of mindfucking is played. You started it. But trust me when I say that you’re not the only one who’s good at it. – Rappler.com

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Ana P. Santos

Ana P. Santos is an investigative journalist who specializes in reporting on the intersections of gender, sexuality, and migrant worker rights.