MANILA, Philippines – “Ay, ‘wag yan…he’s a Pisces.” “Sis, I’m an Aries – you know I don’t do long-term!” “Gemini siya? I’m an Aquarius! Meant to be talaga kami.”

Today’s dating scene has been dominated by astrology. Nowadays, you’re no longer just a quirky Aquarius or a passionate Aries – you’re also “emotional” because of your moon, or “non-committal” because of your Venus. People swear that compatibility can be determined just by your zodiac signs; it seems like the stars have been playing a more vital role in guiding people in making the right (or even wrong) decisions in love. Certain signs have even become non-negotiables, and birth charts have become background checks!

For many, the stars really don’t lie, and “astrolove” – the intersection of astrology and compatibility – has been taking the dating world by storm. Dating app Bumble termed this trend after seeing a renewed interest in astrology from the Gen Z and millennials. After all, isn’t “What’s your sign?” one of the first questions people always ask on the first date?

Bumble’s Astrology badge has become one of the top three most popular lifestyle badges in the country. Recent data showed that users in the Philippines who added the Astrology badge to their dating profile “experienced over 120% more average monthly matches than those without,” Lucille McCart, Bumble’s APAC Communications Director, told Rappler. This badge of your star sign on display allows you to share more about yourself without taking up space in your bio. It even allows you to filter potential matches by star signs.

“Astrology has a universal appeal. It can be a fun conversation starter and a fascinating way to understand each other and build the foundations of a healthy and equal relationship,” Lucille said. But can this shared interest enhance your dating journey by helping you form more meaningful connections? Can it also help you find yourself?

Bumble resident astrologer and drama therapist Monch the Mystic – Monica Lopez Gamboa – believes that your potential match can be found in the heavens. Using one’s natal birth chart, Monica can break down your astrolove journey by analyzing your signs, your love interest’s or partner’s, and even your love languages and coping mechanisms. Based on my insightful birth chart reading with Monica, I can confirm that astrology can be scarily accurate – as long as you keep your mind and heart open!

Let the stars do the talking

Before my 1:1 reading with Monica, I was asked to send my birth place, birth time, and birthday – the basics of a birth chart. The reading then started with a presentation of my chart, plus a simple rundown of what I was seeing on my screen (for a first-timer, the chart and symbols can look very chaotic and overwhelming). I’m an Aquarius Sun, Gemini Moon, and Libra Rising.

“Your birth chart is a map where all the celestial bodies were when you were born. This snapshot is captured from the exact location, at the exact time of your birth. This is your unique astrological thumbprint – a holistic image of a person which describes both inner and other circumstances and all levels of their personal history and experience,” Monica explained.

“The process of understanding our birth chart is the process of embracing our lives. It is the process of radical self-acceptance,” she added, also tying astrology to mental health awareness (they can go hand-in-hand)! Astrology isn’t just for romantic connections – it can help you delve deeper into who you are as a person, friend, sibling, daughter, employee, and loved one. Astrology can supplement inner healing and mental health as serving as a guide in noticing trends and themes in our lives.

“We can use astrology to understand first your connection with yourself and which parts needs more attention and healing. It is only once we have done that for ourselves that we are able to in a healthy way, create and sustain healthy partnerships,” Monica said.

“It is first knowing your values and priorities to be able to attract people and opportunities that are a match. For other people, astrology can be a wonderful tool to connect and establish genuine relationships with other people.”

Note that astrology – as many misconstrue – is not a fortune-teller or a final decision-maker. Rather, it is a tool that can affirm what you already know, or shed some light on hidden aspects about yourself. It can offer guidance or direction, and it lets you “take only what resonates with you” anytime.

The Universe knows

Several synchronicities in my reading were eerily applicable to my life. According to my birth chart, most of my signs are in the “Fourth House” (most of them Aquarius). The Fourth House symbolizes home and family, and Aquarius is known for being unconventional. Monica pointed out that “a lot has been going on in the home,” which rings true because my family life has been very unpredictable, unstable, and not your textbook definition of “normal.”

My Tenth House – which is career – is in Gemini, which is the sign of emotions and communication. Monica said that these are typically good communicators and emotional story-tellers in media or publication careers – and yes, I am a writer! She also mentioned that I am a Libra Rising, which is the social personality. Libras are generally diplomatic, charming, and easygoing peacemakers, but also struggle with saying “no” and being people-pleasers to a fault (raises hand).

My Venus – the planet of love and relationships – is in Aquarius, which means that as an idealistic sign, I am most attracted to partners that I can “mentally connect with.” Same interests, same humor, conversations, and even the same goals, values, and vision in life. Since Aquariuses thrive on friendship, community, and companionship, I am most likely to “fall in love with a friend first, who enjoys spending quality time with me.” True enough, my partner now was my best friend from work first. Monica also got my love languages right – words of affirmation and quality time.

An Aquarius also prioritizes independence and freedom, and this manifests in my desire to be accepted and loved for who I am authentically; in my relationships, I need to feel like I can be myself 100%. Self-care also looks different for everybody – for the Aquarius, it means enjoying a variety of hobbies (also me) and grounding one’s self with light physical movement when we get “too stuck in our heads.”

My Mars – the planet of motivation and desire – is in Capricorn, which means that when it comes to relationships, I am usually in it for the long haul. Even if most of my signs are Air (flighty overthinkers), my Capricorn Mars (an Earth sign) keeps me grounded in terms of long-term relationships and enduring commitments. When it comes to relationships, friends, or work, I have the “stamina” to build the foundation from the bottom up for it to be secure and stable.

My partner’s sign is Leo – the confident, self-assured sign. Monica said Aquarius and Leos are compatible and complement each other: when air meets fire, it grows stronger.

Air signs are typically chill, and may lack the “fire” to be ambitious. Leos can help provide this motivation and support. On the flip side, since Leos are typically set on a goal, an Aquarius can offer new concepts and ideas to expand his world and help him see the “bigger picture” in life. An Aquarius conceptualizes, and the Leo executes. Leos are usually artists, which also holds true!

Monica also mentioned different communication styles between our signs, and how each one’s flaws may come out during arguments, and how to repair conflict better. It was a very eye-opening, validating session that affirmed truths about myself and shed light on personal areas to be aware of. Zodiac signs don’t just come as is: they have both “low road” and “high road” versions, depending on your level of inner work.

For example, a “low road Aquarius” is an extremely independent lone wolf, while the “high road Aquarius” thrives in her “tribe” of like-minded people. A “low road Leo” is attached to his pride and ego, while a “high road Leo” is a leader who gets things done.

A “low road Aries” is impulsive and self-centered; a “high road Aries” is a passionate leader who fights for the underdogs. A “low road Taurus” is stubborn and greedy; a “high road Taurus” is generous and stable. Astrology is not a one-size-fits-all, take-it-as-it-is approach. Like dating, there is more than meets the eye.

“Creating stereotypes about each astrology sign is something so often done. It’s about understanding the development of each sign – the high road and low road – and where the person might be in their development. Even in terms of compatibility, we cannot just be looking at the sun signs of two people and need to take into account the entire chart,” Monica said.

In astrology, just like how you can meet your match, you can also encounter your deal-breakers.

“In astrology, aspects that are incompatible are often identified as planets in “square,” which forms a 90 degree angle, such as the sign pair Libra and Capricorn.

Capricorns can can be seen as self-motivated, often focused on their own goals and valuing tradition, especially in relationships. While both like to initiate, Libra is focused on the other and in maintaining harmony with the other. This is evident in Bumble’s data, which revealed that over the last year (2022) in the Philippines, Libras on Bumble were the luckiest in love! They had the most matches of any star sign, followed by Virgos and Scorpios. When it comes to compatibility, it’s all about finding the sign that balances you out. Compatibility is complementary, and astrology can help you find out what you truly want out of a relationship.

Some people do use astrology with passive dependence, using it to pass blame or simply saying “this is who I am, take it or leave it.” Astrology is meant to be a tool for spiritual growth, through understanding ourselves more. If you want your partner to join you in your astrolove journey, go for it!

“You don’t need to be talking astrology jargon. Stay in the moment. Don’t preach, practice. Live your chart and observe your experiences instead of reading off what apps say and labeling yourself and others based on it. Use your observations, connections, and experiences of your birth chart to connect with your partner,” Monica said, and most importantly, to connect with yourself.

“Let astrology enhance your connection with your matches rather than dictate it. Building a fulfilling relationship involves more than just the stars and the moons. Astrology in online dating gives you a chance to show off personality, and at the same time to also see if the both of you have that initial chemistry that we’re all looking out for,” Lucille said.

“It’s always important to navigate relationships with an open heart and an open mind!” – Rappler.com