Solo parents pushing for divorce: ‘We’re not trying to step on religion’

CEBU, Philippines – For members of the National Council of Solo Parents (NCSP) and Divorce Pilipinas Coalition (DPC), the push for divorce does not have to step on anyone’s religious beliefs.

As members of the Catholic Church oppose the passage of the divorce bill, DPC convenor Alpa Joy Alfafara said during a Rappler Talk on Thursday, June 6, that they respect the views of the religious community but asked for the same respect to be given to them as well.

“Ang itinataas namin dito is the civil authority or civil part of it. Hindi naman po namin kasi inaapakan ‘yung religious right (What we’re raising is the civil authority or civil part of it. We’re not stepping on the religious right),” the divorce advocate said.

Alfafara explained that their group has been fighting for divorce because they believe that those who have been either abandoned or abused by their spouses deserve a legal way out of their marriages.

At present, married individuals can file for an annulment, petition for a declaration of nullity, or legal separation. 

In most cases, petitioners get an annulment as this would guarantee that their children maintain their legitimacy status and allow them to remarry. However, this process has been criticized by lawyers and human rights advocates for being a lengthy and expensive option which could cost up to P300,000 and take years to resolve.

NCSP secretary general Redd de Guzman said that there have been cases of “annulment scams” and that there has been no significant progress in fixing these problems. 

Both advocates believe that divorce would serve as a practical solution that benefits all parties, even the children of former partners who are considered illegitimate as they were born out of wedlock.

“Nandiyan na po ang ating Bill of Rights and that’s what we’re asking: patas na batas para sa lahat (The Bill of Rights is there and that’s what we’re asking: a fair law for all),” Alfafara said.

Solo parents matter

Guzman said that the government has yet to fully meet the needs of solo parents and their families who are considered members of the marginalized sector.

Under the Expanded Solo Parents Welfare Act, solo parents are entitled to a P1,000-monthly subsidy which would be provided by the local government unit (LGU). 

Guzman noted that only 10% of LGUs in the country have actually implemented this policy and that there were an equally low number of solo parents that know about the subsidy.

According to the latest data from the Department of Social Welfare and Development (DSWD), there are at least 14 million solo parents in the country – `95% of whom are women.

Guzman also shared that a majority of solo parents who already go through economic hardships have trouble finding psycho-social assistance.

“So many solo parents have experienced tragedy, trauma, stigma, but they do not have an opportunity to process what they went through and it causes huge problems for the family,” Guzman said in a mix of English and Filipino.

He added that solo parents, especially women, still carry the names of their former partners which may bring back traumatic memories for them. 

Guzman added that many solo parents also face challenges in investing in properties for their children as their former partners can still have a share in the ownership of these properties.

Struggles

In a survey conducted by the NCSP, 60 out of 900 solo-parent respondents are against divorce. Guzman said that the reason cited by those against divorce is their religion.

Evelyn Pologon, an overseas Filipino worker and solo parent, shared during the Rappler Talk that she and fellow members have received below-the-belt insults for being advocates of divorce.

From her experience, she said, many former partners cheated on their spouses and disregarded the needs of their children.

Critics of the divorce bill have claimed that divorce would harm the sanctity of marriage and “destroy” families but Pologon noted that there are many broken families in the country despite the absence of a divorce law.

Pologon said her ex-husband’s children from his current partner are considered illegitimate as they were born outside of marriage. She said that divorce would be able to fix the problem of the children’s legitimacy status.

“For me, it will be legal freedom. I will be able to reclaim my name…. His surname will be his, his new wife and their children will also have it so they will be free as well,” Pologon said in a mix of English and Filipino. – Rappler.com